


I Swear This Time I Mean It

by baeconandeggs, magicdraining (jadeu)



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: BAE2017, Best Friends, Fluff, M/M, Mutual Pining, turned lovers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-23
Updated: 2017-05-23
Packaged: 2018-11-03 23:13:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,400
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10977387
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/baeconandeggs/pseuds/baeconandeggs, https://archiveofourown.org/users/jadeu/pseuds/magicdraining
Summary: bestfriends to lovers au. Baekhyun has been struggling at keeping his feelings for his best friend at bay. Even if he yearns for more, he is already contented at what they have. But then Chanyeol just had to raise his hopes up high.





	I Swear This Time I Mean It

**Author's Note:**

> Author: anonymous  
> Prompt#: 40  
> Title: I Swear This Time I Mean It  
> Word Count: 13,506  
> Side Pairing(s): Kai/Sehun  
> Rating: PG-13  
> Warning(s): no major warnings since the fic is just fluffy fluff but just in case:cussing, sad Baekhyun, soft Baekhyun, Chanyeol turns out to be sad too, pining, dumb chanbaek, clichés (lots of them okay), everything gets cheesy!!!  
> Disclaimer: The celebrities' names/images are merely borrowed and do not represent who the celebrities are in real life. No offense is intended towards them, their families or friends. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. No money is being made from this fictional work. No copyright infringement is intended.
> 
> Author's Note: title taken from mayday parade’s song with the same title ^^ if this isn’t the fluffiest i’ve written then idk what is. this fic is so laidback and written “lazily” >< pls don’t h8 me cuz I rly didn’t think this through, just went on with my fluff gut feeling \TvT/ and huuuuge ass thanks to my wife! for all the hand-holding and for giving The Best Suggestions™ so lucky to have you♡ enjoy reading!

 

* * *

  
  
  
  
  
  
_Some day in February, ten years ago, I met the most handsome boy I had ever seen in my life. He was bubbly and sweet, and his almond-shaped eyes mesmerized me, and his smile – his smile that was brighter than the sun – was perfect. I was young, but I already knew he was everything I could ask for. I was determined to make him stay by my side always, even when he slaps me on my shoulder when he laughs too hard (which happens almost every time he laughs), or even when he’s gotten used to making me his bolster every time he sleeps over at my place or I at his. I might complain about these little things all the time but the truth is, I’ve never cherished anything as much as I did the moments he touched me. The only way I can keep him by my side was to be his best friend, and I’m contented at that._  
  
  
  
  
  


 

* * *

  
  
  
  
  
  
The door opens and Baekhyun’s mother appears. She’s been calling him from downstairs since a while ago but Baekhyun’s been busy scribbling down his feelings on his little black notebook.  
  
“What were you doing?”  
  
“Nothing!” Baekhyun says too quickly, avoiding meeting his mother’s squinting eyes as he tucks the black notebook under his books on the desk.  
  
“Did you hear me call for you?” Baekhyun nods. “Well, you should know that Chanyeol’s gonna finish the tray of cookies I just baked if you don’t come down now.”  
  
Baekhyun fakes a gasp and dramatically scurries downstairs. He hears his mother chuckle at him and imagines her shaking her head just like how she does every time they’re in a playful mood.  
  
Chanyeol has been a part of the Byun household now as much as Baekhyun is a part of the Park’s. When Mama Byun cooks her heavenly chocolate chip cookies, it’s like Chanyeol can smell it from across the street and invites himself over to compete with Baekhyun in chomping down the most cookies. Sometimes Baekhyun invites himself over at Chanyeol’s house at the excuse of making the homework together but they always end up playing video games and making the homework the next day, fifteen minutes before class.  
  
“Chanyeol, you cheater, you started ahead!” Baekhyun whines when he sees four spots on the tray from the oven already lacking of cookies.  
  
“I thought you weren’t coming down.”  
  
All the fight leaves Baekhyun when Chanyeol looks at him and smiles so adorably, his curly fringe falling to his eyes and his giant ears sticking out from the mop of dark hair. Baekhyun’s gonna stand by what he has thought since day one – Chanyeol is the most handsome boy he has ever seen in his life. It takes a lot for Baekhyun to hold himself back from reaching out and cupping Chanyeol’s jaw so he channels all that want into the cookie. Picking one cookie up instead of holding Chanyeol in his palm.  
  
Baekhyun thinks he has gotten better at controlling his emotions. It used to be so painful pining for something he can never have – and his best friend, at that. Someone who’s always so close by him but still so far and out of his reach. Baekhyun knew unrequited love would make him miserable – he has read confessions on some Facebook page, heard stories at online forums. He knew he should’ve crushed these unwarranted feelings for his best friend. But he couldn’t really help it when the heart wants what it wants. Baekhyun sighs inwardly. Things have gotten pretty out of hand now that even just glancing at Chanyeol makes his heart flutter.  
  
Mama Byun gets in between them and tells them to go sit down or something, so she’ll plate the cookies and they can all eat them peacefully, no need for a competition, and sighs at young kids these days.  
  
“Hey, do you have plans tonight?” Chanyeol asks as they wend their way to the living hall.  
  
“Just Overwatch, I guess. Still at your place, right?”  
  
Chanyeol grabs the remote and turns the TV before plopping down on the couch too close to Baekhyun. Their thighs are pressed against each other. “Let’s go to Sehun’s, then. His parents are out of town and there’s this—”  
  
“—party in his mansion.” Baekhyun finishes for him. “Yeah, I got the text, Yeol. I thought you wouldn’t want to come since, you know. You just broke up with your girlfriend.”  
  
Chanyeol shrugs. “Nah. Not really in the mood to mope about some breakup.”  
  
Baekhyun likes it that Chanyeol hasn’t shown a strong attachment to any of his girlfriends before. He hasn’t cried over a girl, in fact. Inside, Baekhyun’s smiling to himself as if it’s an achievement for him or something.  
  
But then Chanyeol adds, “Plus it’s in parties where I can get a new girlfriend, right?”  
  
And that’s when Baekhyun’s small bubble of happiness shatters. Baekhyun swallows the lump in his throat and tries to calm down the churning in his stomach. How he wishes he can level up from being a best friend to a boyfriend in some party, too. How he wishes Chanyeol would look at him and realizes he’s just as in love with his best friend as Baekhyun is with him. Baekhyun scowls at his thoughts – _Control yourself, Baek._ Baekhyun is saved from affirming when Mama Byun arrives with the platter of cookies.  
  
“I suppose we could go.”  
  
“Great.” Chanyeol beams at Baekhyun. “Mom,” Chanyeol says to Mama Byun, “Baek and I are going to a friend’s house tonight. Might be coming back late.”  
  
Mama Byun has always been fine with his son going to parties as long as he’s with Chanyeol. She knows they can take care of each other and if their ten-year friendship isn’t proof to that, then she doesn’t know what is. The Park’s residence is just across the street and she’s woken up one too many times to find out her son Baekhyun isn’t in his room but had stayed over at Chanyeol’s.  
  
“As long as you kids would be back in one piece.”  
  
Chanyeol’s grin is almost blinding. (Baekhyun always thinks a grinning Chanyeol shines brighter than the sun.) Mama Byun leaves the living hall. Incidentally, Chanyeol and Baekhyun pick up the same cookie out of the several pieces on the plate. Baekhyun’s lips turn down into a pout when Chanyeol doesn’t let go of the cookie.  
  
“Yeol, I got it first.”  
  
“I don’t see your name on this cookie, though,” Chanyeol retorts.  
  
“This is ridiculous,” Baekhyun says as he lets go of the coveted cookie and moves to get another one. “You are so childish—”  
  
Baekhyun is stopped from talking when Chanyeol suddenly prods the cookie into Baekhyun’s mouth gently. Baekhyun glares at his best friend who is grinning widely back at him.  
  
“Here’s your treat,” Chanyeol says.  
  
Baekhyun whines softly, but takes a bite of the proffered cookie. (How can he refuse the sight of Chanyeol smiling from ear to ear while feeding him?) Chanyeol’s callous thumb brushes his lower lip, hitching Baekhyun’s breath in his throat. Chanyeol pats Baekhyun’s head with his free hand, saying, “Baekhyunee is such a good boy.”  
  
Baekhyun almost chokes at Chanyeol’s words. He’s never gonna get used to Chanyeol cooing at him like he’s a small pup or a toddler. He pretends to grumble under his breath about being treated as a puppy by a giant puppy himself, but when he sees Chanyeol eating the other half of the cookie he has bitten, Baekhyun’s speech function gets lost.  
  
In some ways, Chanyeol just got an indirect kiss from Baekhyun. Who says sharing water bottles is the only form of indirect kissing? Sharing food is, too, thank you very much.  
  
After shaking up Baekhyun’s world, Chanyeol casually reclines against the couch and swings an arm behind Baekhyun, switching the channel to History. Now, Chanyeol and Baekhyun agree on a whole variety of things, but not this. While Chanyeol wants to watch Nat Geo, Animal Planet, History, Baekhyun always asks for E! or Star World or Disney.  
  
“Change the channel, Yeol.” Baekhyun’s tone is low and a bit muffled with the cookie he’s eating, but Chanyeol just doesn’t obey him and instead, he tightens his grip on the remote, smiling a mischievous smile.  
  
When Baekhyun reaches for the remote, Chanyeol, the sly bastard that he is, stretches his arm away from him. With Baekhyun’s short limbs, he leans towards Chanyeol, his lips almost brushing Chanyeol’s cheek, one palm on Chanyeol’s bicep and the other struggling to reach for the goddamned remote. _Too close,_ Baekhyun thinks, as sirens wail inside his head.  
  
Chanyeol’s other hand pushes Baekhyun’s face away, his palm almost enough to cover Baekhyun’s entire face. Baekhyun risks it all and sticks his tongue out to lick Chanyeol’s palm (and savors the residual taste of Mama Byun’s freshly-baked cookie on it) before Chanyeol shrieks and falls sideways on the couch. Baekhyun, by gravity or inertia or fate, falls on top of him. Chanyeol makes a move to wipe the wetness on his palm on Baekhyun’s raven hair and that’s when Baekhyun stiffens.  
  
Chanyeol’s hipbone is digging through Baekhyun’s stomach, and literally right in front of Baekhyun’s face is Chanyeol’s chest. It shouldn’t be awkward because they’ve had more compromising positions than this when they tried wrestling each other a few years ago, only back then, Baekhyun was too young to think about the romantic feelings he harbors for his best friend.  
  
Chanyeol’s hand on the back of Baekhyun’s head starts playing with the soft strands of hair there and Baekhyun looks up to see Chanyeol smiling down at him. Baekhyun blinks, like how a camera does when it captures a photo. _What a sight it was._  
  
Baekhyun should really control his pounding heartbeat lest Chanyeol ask him about it.  
  
“I’ve always known your hair is soft, but damn—” Chanyeol combs his fingers through tufts of Baekhyun’s hair. “I’ll never get used to it.”  
  
Baekhyun smirks and easily grabs the remote from Chanyeol’s loosened grip before sitting up and turning the channel to Star Movies where there’s a rerun of Deadpool.  
  
“You’re not fair. You caught me off-guard there,” Chanyeol whines and sits up, sliding his ass on the couch to sit closer to Baekhyun again before draping an arm around Baekhyun’s shoulder.  
  
Baekhyun gives the forearm hanging on his shoulder a sidelong glance. Seeing the tattoo on the inside of Chanyeol’s wrist makes him smile on the inside. It’s something he shares with Chanyeol, and something Chanyeol would never do for his girlfriends in the future (because Chanyeol whined about the needles being too painful and swore he won’t get another tattoo ever again). They got it on Chanyeol’s sixteenth birthday, an impulsive decision that will last a lifetime.  
  
_Aimer et être aimé._  
  
They’re French words Baekhyun fancied but totally did not expect for Chanyeol to tattoo it on both of their wrists. Yup, Baekhyun has it on his own wrist, too, dragged by Chanyeol into the shop and getting their friendship tattoo. Some best friends get friendship rings or even just friendship bracelets but Chanyeol? He just had to want a fucking tattoo on their wrists. The excruciating pain of the needles piercing their skin and drawing out blood… Baekhyun can never forget that experience.  
  
While the 8px letters are on Chanyeol’s left wrist, Baekhyun got his on his right. Chanyeol always stands on Baekhyun’s right and vice versa. Every time their wrists brush against each other while they’re walking or sleeping side by side, Baekhyun gets reminded of their tattoos. It’s not much, yeah, but it still makes Baekhyun’s heart flutter.  
  
“Well, you ate the cookies ahead of me, you cheater, so I guess that makes us even.”  
  
Chanyeol pinches Baekhyun gently on his waist — which doesn’t hurt at all — but Baekhyun still whines and uses it as an excuse to snuggle closer to Chanyeol’s warmth, settling his shoulder under Chanyeol’s armpits and nestling his head on Chanyeol’s shoulder.  
  
All the way till the end of the movie, Baekhyun occasionally inhales and exhales deeply through his mouth, because it feels like he is choking.  
  
  
  
  
  


 

*

  
  
  
  
  
  
High school parties were always the same the way Baekhyun has remembered them. Red cups refilled with cheap beer, the loud music, racy and bordering sleazy games – definitely not the environment that Baekhyun prefers. Chanyeol is sitting beside him, but he’s having too much fun to pay Baekhyun any attention.  
  
When Baekhyun stands up, Chanyeol doesn’t even turn to look at him. He weaves to the kitchen and hopes there’s a drink that’s not too bitter for his throat to tolerate. He scans the fridge for something until someone shouts, “Hey, don’t touch the cake!”  
  
It’s Sehun. Baekhyun turns around and raises his hands up in surrender. “Didn’t really get to touch anything yet. Do you have… juice?”  
  
Sehun chuckles at him but takes out the carton of apple juice at the back of the fridge. Baekhyun pours a glass of it for himself as Sehun goes back to wherever he’s been. Baekhyun is not really keen on going back and sitting there around everyone else. When he steps under the arch leading back to the living hall, he freezes, stomach dropping to the floor, a lump forming at the back of his throat that’s too thick to swallow. There’s a girl sitting on Chanyeol’s lap.  
  
Then Baekhyun remembers the conversation that afternoon. _“Plus it’s in parties where I can get a new girlfriend, right?”_ Of course. What was Baekhyun even thinking? That after fighting over the remote like a newlywed couple, Chanyeol will miraculously develop feelings for him? _It doesn’t work that way, Baekhyun,_ he tells himself. If Chanyeol would develop feelings for him, he would have done so ages ago. Ten years and still friends? Well, that will be his only role in Chanyeol’s life for the rest of this lifetime. Baekhyun should know better than start hoping for the impossible. He really should’ve known better than to fall in love with his best friend in the first place.  
  
He goes to the sink, puts his glass on the counter and clutches the edge of it because his knees are definitely weakening. He takes heavy breathes in and out, praying it would eradicate the sting in his chest or at least calm it.  
  
“Baekhyun?” It’s Sehun again. For a host of a high school party, he sure is concerned with his guests.  
  
Baekhyun faces him with horrified eyes like he’s caught eating the cake Sehun specifically said not to touch. “I swear I didn’t touch the cake—”  
  
“I wasn’t asking about that.” Sehun chuckles. “No offense but you look like shit right now and it doesn’t even look like you’ve drunk alcohol.”  
  
Baekhyun pouts and mutters, “The beer is bitter,” under his breath as an attempt to divert the topic.  
  
“Jongdae is throwing up!” Someone from the living hall shouts and it seems like everyone is… cheering about it?  
  
Sehun hurries to the source of the commotion. “I swear to god if you throw up on the carpet—”  
  
And Baekhyun is left alone again.  
  
  
  
  
  


 

*

  
  
  
  
  
  
The porch seems inviting when Baekhyun opens the back door. The synthetic wooden beach chair looks like it’s comfortable enough with its thick cushion. The night isn’t too cold so Baekhyun settles there. The living hall is loud but he can hear the cicadas disturbing the silent of night here as well. It feels like he’s being one with nature tonight.  
  
When Chanyeol and Baekhyun first went here, they laid down on the floor of this porch because it was summer and the heat was too intense. They were just on the floorboards, spread-eagled, and Chanyeol whistling some pop song because he believed it will summon the summer breeze. Baekhyun smiles at the memory, wondering if he had realized he liked Chanyeol more than a friend at that point.  
  
He actually couldn’t remember when he started having these feelings for his best friend. Perhaps it was when Chanyeol stood up for him against the kids in middle school forcing him to give them his lunch money. He could never forget Chanyeol’s livid face when he caught them. As cheesy as it sounds, he became Baekhyun’s hero at that point. It cemented their friendship.  
  
Or maybe it was when Chanyeol let him sleep over on the same bed with him, stroking Baekhyun’s sides as Chanyeol sang a lullaby for Baekhyun to fall asleep faster. Baekhyun smiles to himself upon remembering Chanyeol murmuring, “I hope my voice got it right.” Baekhyun had told him it was just a lullaby, but Chanyeol apparently wanted _just the best for Baekhyunee._ God, Chanyeol already had his deep baritone voice even when they just started puberty. His voice was perfect – to send Baekhyun off to sleep and to wake him up with the sunrise. They were what, twelve? Yet Chanyeol showed him affection he only got from his mother before.  
  
Oh, Baekhyun remembers this one girlfriend Chanyeol had which was jealous of Baekhyun. He wanted to laugh at her face when she said it. Jealous of Baekhyun? Her? _Bitch, I’m the one jealous of you!_ Baekhyun had wanted to scream. But Baekhyun never got the chance because Chanyeol had broken up with her right then and there. Another one of the Chanyeol’s line Baekhyun can never forget: “If you can’t accept me being with Baekhyun, then I can’t accept you either.” He dragged Baekhyun away from there and they ate ice cream on their way home.  
  
It wasn’t his intention but Baekhyun’s feelings only grew every day as he tried to get rid of them. It’s Chanyeol’s fault. For being so boyfriend. Baekhyun didn’t ask him to be boyfriend-ish with him. But then again, Chanyeol didn’t ask him to fall in love with his best friend either.  
  
Baekhyun sighs. He’s in too deep now. One thing is for sure, he can’t erase these feelings anymore.  
  
Baekhyun looks at his watch. It’s been forty minutes or so since he went out. Chanyeol hasn’t looked for him. _No one_ has looked for him. The thought brings a dark cloud over his head, even if he has accepted it a long time ago that no one would look for him at a party full of interesting people.  
  
He weaves his way towards the living hall and finds out that Jongdae didn’t throw up on the carpet, but on the couch. That must be the reason why no one’s sleeping on it and people are passed out on the floor. Chanyeol is sleeping on the carpet, alone.  
  
Baekhyun sighs in relief that the girl who was on Chanyeol’s lap a while ago isn’t around anymore. But he frowns at his attitude of being selfish – how can he be a good best friend if he couldn’t support Chanyeol in finding a new girlfriend? Honestly, it’s so hard to pick a side whether he should be the boy who got a crush on Chanyeol or the boy who is Chanyeol’s best friend. _Why can’t he be both?!_  
  
Sehun finds Baekhyun again. “Hey, you should go upstairs and crash at one of the rooms. Looks like Chanyeol is too pissed drunk to move.”  
  
Baekhyun shakes his head. He knows they can manage. “No thanks, I’ll call a cab.”  
  
Sehun nods. "Oh, and Baekhyun, if you need to talk about something you can’t talk about with Chanyeol, I’m here.”  
  
Baekhyun gives him a genuine smile.  
  
  
  
  
  


 

*

  
  
  
  
  
  
Baekhyun pokes Chanyeol’s cheek where he knows the dimple would be if Chanyeol smiles. “Hey.”  
  
Chanyeol groans but cracks an eye open and the smile he gives Baekhyun is breathtaking. He looks like a child, but so handsome with that boyish charm of his that makes Baekhyun swoon.  
  
“Let’s go home.”  
  
Thankfully, Chanyeol isn’t as drunk as he seems to be because Baekhyun doesn’t have to put much effort in making him stand and leading him out the door. Baekhyun waves a goodbye at Sehun who is hauling a sleeping Jongin over his shoulder.  
  
When Baekhyun closes the door behind him, the wind is knocked out of his lungs as Chanyeol pins him to the door with his own body, snaking his arms around Baekhyun’s waist and — is he kneading Baekhyun’s ass? Fuck. Baekhyun fucking knew Chanyeol’s huge hands would feel good on his ass – _so_ good, in fact. He hears Chanyeol’s rugged breathing beside his ears and Baekhyun bites his lower lip to keep himself from moaning.  
  
Chanyeol is too close again. And he’s even sticking his hand at such an inappropriate place. The sirens are wailing again. Ten times louder in Baekhyun’s head.  
  
Before Baekhyun can (reluctantly) push Chanyeol off him, there’s no need to, when the latter is the one pulling himself away from Baekhyun to throw up on the pavement.  
  
_Okay. So Chanyeol was just drunk._ He wouldn’t grope Baekhyun while sober. Truth to be told, Baekhyun wants Chanyeol to touch him on _places_ and for a second there, Baekhyun thought Chanyeol has wanted him. Joke’s on him, though. Baekhyun wants to laugh at himself.  
  
He has actually never seen his best friend this drunk before. He also thought that Chanyeol can hold his liquor quite well, but apparently not. The driver keeps flitting glances at them in random intervals. Probably because Chanyeol is slumped against Baekhyun on the backseat, sticking to Baekhyun like a kid afraid of losing his way in the supermarket, whispering gibberish against sweaty skin (“You— hnn,” to which Baekhyun doesn’t want to dwell on thinking because it sounds like Chanyeol is moaning).  
  
Maybe the driver thinks they’re hormone-driven teenagers who can’t wait to get inside each other’s pants. Baekhyun laughs at the thought. It is partly true, but it’s only one-sided. Baekhyun knows Chanyeol wouldn’t reciprocate his desires.  
  
Chanyeol’s nose brushes against Baekhyun’s jaw and on the spot below Baekhyun’s ear. The little gestures sort of... tickle Baekhyun, giving him the kind of tingle that sends electric jolts down his spine. Chanyeol’s breath is warm against his skin even if it smells of liquor and Baekhyun feels like he’s bound for hell.  
  
When they arrive at Baekhyun’s house, Baekhyun pays the fare and doesn’t wait for the change, hauling Chanyeol through doors and the staircase until they’re in Baekhyun’s room.  
  
Baekhyun throws Chanyeol on the right side of the bed not too gently, tucking him under the blanket. Baekhyun sighs at the sight of his best friend on his bed, unconscious and flushed and everything Baekhyun has ever wanted. He brushes Chanyeol’s fringe away from his forehead and just stares at his handsome features — the soft planes of his cheeks, the smooth slope of his nose, his long lashes... What use would it be to pine for something he can never have? Baekhyun sighs.  
  
After changing his clothes and freshening up, Baekhyun lies down on the left side of the bed and tries to catch a wink of sleep. But his mind keeps going back to that sensation of Chanyeol’s hands on his butt cheeks.  
  
Chanyeol’s hands. On his ass. Baekhyun’s cheeks burn just thinking about it.  
  
Chanyeol was drunk. Perhaps he just thought Baekhyun was that girl he was having fun with at the party. Yeah, that’s the only explanation there is.  
  
The digit 4 glares back at him when Baekhyun looks at the bedside clock. It’s been almost two hours and still, he can’t sleep on his own bed. He puts an arm over his eyes and forces himself to just sleep already.  
  
Usually, with Chanyeol right beside him, he can doze off pretty easily. But something is different tonight. Unlike the usual, Chanyeol is sleeping like a log, his arms not wrapped around Baekhyun’s body, and he reeks of alcohol, not the citrus scent Baekhyun has become accustomed to.  
  
Baekhyun’s thoughts stop and he freezes when he hears some shuffling beside him. _Please just sleep and let me think about my life in peace,_ is what Baekhyun keeps saying inside his head.  
  
But apparently, Chanyeol has other plans. He awakes and drops his feet on the floor and makes his way to Baekhyun’s en suite bathroom. Baekhyun continues to pretend he’s sleeping, not daring to open his eyes, before he hears the water running and Chanyeol brushing his teeth. Baekhyun’s pretty sure now he’s gonna welcome the morning without a blink of sleep.  
  
Chanyeol returns to the bed and just sits down on it. Baekhyun, still pretending to be asleep, wonders if Chanyeol’s gonna go back to sleep or not. He hears Chanyeol sigh and he sounds so problematic. What could his best friend’s problem be that he hasn’t shared with Baekhyun yet?  
  
Baekhyun almost jumps out of his skin when Chanyeol caresses the forearm on his head but somehow manages to be as still as a log. Chanyeol’s touch is soft, even if his palm is a bit rough. His thumb traces the tiny letters on the inside of Baekhyun’s wrist – their friendship tattoo. Baekhyun holds his breath. Chanyeol slowly takes his hand, intertwining their fingers together, and Baekhyun almost loses it the moment Chanyeol brings up their held hands to his lips.  
  
Chanyeol’s soft lips touch the back of Baekhyun’s palm.  
  
And Baekhyun almost wants to bolt upright. _Chanyeol just kissed his hand._  
  
Is it just his imagination? Did he finally fall asleep and is now dreaming about all of this?  
  
As quick as the kiss was planted on his hand, the warmth is gone. The bed shifts and Baekhyun hears the soft sound of footsteps until a door creaks open and is slowly shut. Chanyeol has left the room to probably go back to his own, leaving Baekhyun breathless and with a pounding heart, hopes of being more than just Chanyeol’s best friend soaring high.  
  
  
  
  
  


 

* * *

  
  
  
  
  
  
Chanyeol plops on his cold bed. He already misses Baekhyun’s warmth beside him. It’s not the same being away from him.  
  
Just like last night when Baekhyun left the couch. Chanyeol was surprised that Baekhyun left his side, but who was he to tie his best friend down? He tried to keep his hands to himself because god knows where he’d touch Baekhyun under the influence of alcohol in his system. When Baekhyun stood up from the couch, though, he sure as heck wanted to grab him and make him sit on his lap. But, no, because that’s beyond the line of friendship.  
  
Some minutes pass and a girl approached Chanyeol. He wasn’t interested, but it seemed like she had been waiting for a chance like that to come. At first she was just sitting beside him, clinging like a monkey, but when the guys told her Chanyeol was apparently looking for a new girl, she just climbed on his lap, uninvited.  
  
“I’m Minah,” she said brightly, giggling and resting one of her palms on Chanyeol’s chest but she gets ignored. She might have sensed his disinterest on her because she just hopped on to another guy.  
  
_Baekhyun, where are you?_ Chanyeol waited, glancing at the arch to the kitchen whenever he’s not throwing a drink to his throat. There’s no sign of Baekhyun, however.  
  
Chanyeol was sulking at the fact that Baekhyun left him alone on this couch and probably found some new friends to socialize with. He knows Baekhyun can make friends with just one sentence. After all, it only took him one word and Chanyeol was certain he wants to grow old with the pretty boy who had the brightest smile. Baekhyun had him at hello. Yup, just one word.  
  
No one can blame Chanyeol. The guy was just— Baekhyun has the cutest droopy eyes. Sleepy or not, his eyes sure are charming. The moles scattered all over his body are like constellations. Chanyeol could name Baekhyun’s skin his personal Milky Way. It doesn’t help that Baekhyun always smells like a baby since Mama Byun makes him use baby bath gel. The scent drives Chanyeol crazy, honestly, especially when they lie side by side on the same bed at night. It’s the reason why Chanyeol uses Baekhyun as his bolster. He might have said something like Baekhyun’s baby fats being so comfortable for him but he really just wants Baekhyun’s baby scent to lull him to sleep.  
  
Chanyeol could go on listing down and describing his Baekhyun but his favorite was Baekhyun’s lips that form the Hangeul of s even when he’s not doing it on purpose. Those lips – thin and pink and so soft. Chanyeol would know their softness since he has grazed his thumb along Baekhyun’s lips countless of times now during their sleepovers when he knows Baekhyun is sleeping.  
  
He pulls his comforter over his head, reflecting on his sins. He’s not proud that he touches Baekhyun when the latter is asleep and can’t do anything to reject him. The farthest he has gone was grazing his thumb on Baekhyun’s lips and that, too, is getting frequent recently. He’s a coward, he knows, for not fessing up. But he’s just a boy, in love with his best friend, afraid of rejection and losing their years of friendship.  
  
Last night, however, after Sehun’s party… he almost lost control over himself…  
  
He wasn’t that drunk but he pretended to be totally wasted so he can have an excuse to grab Baekhyun’s perky butt. It felt _so_ good against his palms. But he realized how wrong it was and how sober Baekhyun is, probably cursing Chanyeol in his mind, so he pulled back as if burned and, again, pretended to throw up on the pavement.  
  
He couldn’t help it on the way back home, though. Baekhyun smelled like he always does – like a baby – that Chanyeol just had to snuggle closer.  
  
When he woke up with Baekhyun beside him, he smiles inwardly. It always felt nice waking up next to Baekhyun.  
  
After washing up, he found himself staring at Baekhyun’s sleeping form, an arm over his head. He caresses that arm, smiling when he sees the tattoo on Baekhyun’s wrist – identical with the one he got. For once, he let himself loose and plants a kiss on Baekhyun’s hand.  
  
The first kiss he has given Baekhyun was on the crown of the latter’s head, when he woke up one morning with Baekhyun’s face buried on his chest and the two of them tangled together under the sheets. His heart stuttered so early in the morning, all because of one boy.  
  
This kiss tonight was the second one he has given Baekhyun. And it sure as hell wouldn’t be the last, as long as Baekhyun stays by his side, even as just his best friend.  
  
Chanyeol throws the comforter away from him, suffocated with it and with his thoughts. He curls up on his side. All these years since he found out his feelings for his best friend, Chanyeol has been struggling to hold back as each day passes by.  
  
Of all people… why did he have to fall in love with his best friend?  
  
  
  
  
  


 

* * *

  
  
  
  
  
  
_I contemplated on telling him about my feelings for him. Should I tell him? How should I tell him? That I’m hopelessly in love with him. I, the person he grew up with as a best friend, the person he confessed so many secrets to, turned out to have this crush on him. But I guess it’s already too late when he said he had this crush on the girl in our History class. Too late to tell him he’s the first thing I think of in the morning and the last thing I think of before I sleep, and that I spend the time in between thinking about us – just me being delusional that there could be an us. And I was contented being by his side as a best friend, but when he kissed my hand last night, this hope I thought I had extinguished long ago was ignited._  
  
  
  
  
  


 

* * *

  
  
  
  
  
  
On Monday, Chanyeol wakes Baekhyun up like the usual, jumping into the bed and straddling the lump of human burrito that is Baekhyun.  
  
“Wake up, Bunny Byun Buns!” Over the years, Chanyeol has made up so many ridiculous nickname for his best friend and this one twists the tongue most.  
  
“Get off me, Park,” Baekhyun grunts.  
  
Chanyeol’s already wearing his uniform, but he’ll still be eating the breakfast Mama Byun prepared downstairs while Baekhyun gets ready for school.  
  
“You look so fucking sexy when you just woke up,” Chanyeol says, hovering over Baekhyun on the bed. He laughs when Baekhyun glares at him ineffectively with sleepy, droopy eyes and hair that sticks out to every direction.  
  
When Baekhyun rolls off the bed with only his boxers and a thin white shirt on, Chanyeol slaps his butt. Baekhyun bites back a moan and settles at glaring back at his best friend again. He remembers last Saturday night when Chanyeol was drunk and groped his butt. The thought is making him blush.  
  
“Stop touching me,” he snarls. But he knows that Chanyeol knows he isn’t serious.  
  
The truth is, he wants Chanyeol to touch him more.  
  
  
  
  
  


 

*

  
  
  
  
  
  
The both of them bid Mama Byun their goodbyes. Chanyeol helps Baekhyun put his pink helmet on, strapping it under his chin. _Oh, it’s such a good morning._ Baekhyun smiles before hopping on the scooter behind Chanyeol and it takes all the effort in him not to sniff Chanyeol like a pup. The scooter’s engine comes to life and they start their way to school.  
  
This is the usual. This is Baekhyun’s routine. Every morning going to school when he’s riding this scooter behind his best friend, he subtly inhales Chanyeol’s citrus fragrance mixed with Chanyeol’s own natural scent. The wind is a great help, bringing him a whiff of Chanyeol even when he doesn’t lean closer.  
  
What’s out of the usual today is Baekhyun trying to hide the huge grin he has been sporting since yesterday. His cheeks have been hurting because he couldn’t stop smiling since feeling those soft lips on his hand.  
  
Yesterday went by pretty fast. Baekhyun doesn’t think he can ever stop thinking about Chanyeol and his feelings for him. It’s a good thing Chanyeol continued his slumber in his own bedroom, giving Baekhyun space to breathe. His uncontrollable heart couldn’t stop beating so freaking fast. Chanyeol’s lips have somehow imprinted a tingling sensation on Baekhyun’s hand that Baekhyun cannot shake off.  
  
Also, yesterday, Baekhyun contemplated about finally confessing his feelings to his best friend.  
  
He can already picture it out — Chanyeol alone in the classroom with him. And Baekhyun, perhaps stuttering the words, would say he likes Chanyeol more than a friend. And Chanyeol would say he likes him the same way too, likes him enough to leave kisses on his knuckles or cheeks or forehead when he’s asleep. And Baekhyun would feign surprise before Chanyeol would take him into his arms and they’d run to the sunset together — okay, that’s too much.  
  
“Hey, what are you thinking of?” Chanyeol asks.  
  
“Huh? N-nothing.” _If only you knew I think about you when I wake up and dream of you when I sleep_...  
  
“It’s not nothing if you’re smiling like an idiot in love back there. Tell me,” Chanyeol insists.  
  
Baekhyun blushes and clutches Chanyeol’s waist tighter, burrowing his face between Chanyeol’s shoulder blades. Baekhyun’s not usually like this – getting shy around his own best friend? Nope, never. But he’s been caught daydreaming. About him and Chanyeol, no less! And that’s embarrassing enough for him.  
  
“It’s really nothing, Chanyeol-ah,” Baekhyun mutters into the starched uniform of his best friend.  
  
“Ooh, you’re hiding something from me now, Baekhyunee? Do you have a crush on someone now?”  
  
“N-nope.” As expected, Baekhyun is stuttering as he talks about crushes with Chanyeol. “What about you?” Baekhyun tries to ask, nervous about Chanyeol’s answer.  
  
In all the years they’ve been best friends, Chanyeol always tells him about the pretty girl here, the cute girl there. But if Chanyeol’s into girls, then why did he kiss Baekhyun’s hand yesterday? It’s so confusing...  
  
Chanyeol just hums. “We’re here.”  
  
Baekhyun has been so focused on Chanyeol that he didn’t notice that they’ve reached the campus now. Some of the students on the sidewalk stare at them as they pass by, with Baekhyun being close — _too close_ — to Chanyeol.  
  
All the way to the classroom, Chanyeol persists on making Baekhyun spill about his crush. He even uses his aegyo which is just reserved for desperate measures, and Baekhyun wants to confess right there and then. But instead, Baekhyun pretends to be annoyed and snaps at him, “If you won’t tell me the who your crush is this time, you’re not getting any detail about mine.”  
  
Baekhyun wants to punch himself when he sees Chanyeol looking like a kicked puppy. Still, it surprises him when Chanyeol locks his arms around Baekhyun’s head as a way of apologizing.  
  
“Sorry, Bunny Buns. I won’t ask again. Now stop being mad at me.”  
  
Baekhyun huffs a breath as he escapes Chanyeol’s hold. (He wants to stay in those arms forever, but he’s afraid firstly of being too obvious with his feelings towards his best friend and secondly of being judged by his school mates.)  
  
“I didn’t say you couldn’t ask again,” Baekhyun mutters. “I’m saying we trade information.”  
  
His heart is pounding too fast when he sees Chanyeol thinking about the offer. He has about a minute to think of who he can name as his Fake Crush.  
  
But then Chanyeol says, “Nah, I can live with this,” before he goes inside the classroom, leaving Baekhyun blinking at the threshold. _Live with what?_  
  
When Baekhyun enters the classroom, he finds Sehun surprisingly perched on Jongin’s lap. When did they become a couple, these two?  
  
“When did you and Jongin even happen?”  
  
“At the party in my house,” Sehun answers.  
  
“Wh-what, how...” Baekhyun may be overreacting but he seriously thought these two were as straight as Chanyeol.  
  
“Well, he told me he liked me after throwing up on me—” Baekhyun cringes, “–and we washed up so we were both shirtless when he started kissing me—”  
  
“Okay! I get it.” Baekhyun doesn’t need to hear anything that happened beyond that. He slumps on his seat.  
  
It doesn’t feel right to say he’s jealous of his friends getting into relationships. It’s just that... He glances back at Chanyeol who is seated a couple of rows away and frantically scribbling their homework. (Baekhyun isn’t worrying about the homework unlike him because he had made it yesterday while Chanyeol was sleeping his hangover off.)  
  
His friends are all getting into relationships and... is it right for Baekhyun to feel out of place with something so petty like that?  
  
He sighs. _Still..._ All he wants is for Chanyeol to like him back. Maybe not as much as Baekhyun likes him, but enough so that he would hold Baekhyun in his arms gently and make Baekhyun sit on his lap, too. _Don’t get too ahead of yourself, Baekhyun._  
  
“You should just confess,” Sehun says out of nowhere. Baekhyun looks back at him with wide eyes because it seemed like he has read Baekhyun’s mind.  
  
“Wh-what do you mean?”  
  
Jongin rolls his eyes playfully, leaning his chin on Sehun’s shoulder. Baekhyun pauses his mind and takes note of how gorgeous the couple look together. Sehun may seem nonchalant about Jongin’s little gestures but the blush on his freckled cheeks tells the effect Jongin has on him.  
  
“Everyone can see you have feelings for your best friend,” Jongin whispers loud enough for Baekhyun to hear.  
  
Baekhyun glances apprehensively at Chanyeol. He’s still blissfully ignorant about his surroundings as he focuses on the long homework. It would be impossible for him to hear their conversation, no matter how huge his ears are. Other students are pretty much uninterested to eavesdrop, too, so they’re pretty safe.  
  
“Are you serious?” Baekhyun is panicking.  
  
Sehun laughs. “You should see the way you look at him, honestly.”  
  
“It’s like how I look at Sehun,” Jongin says.  
  
“Your gaze is hotter than Chanyeol’s, though,” Sehun mutters, turning his head around and nipping at Jongin’s jaw.  
  
“Baby, we’re trying to cheer up Baekhyun here,” Jongin says, but he drops a kiss on Sehun’s shoulder nonetheless.  
  
Baekhyun looks away, faces the board rather than those two lovebirds. He thinks about what they’ve said, though. He honestly didn’t know Jongin had a crush on Sehun, or how Jongin looks at Sehun.  
  
Perhaps Baekhyun is just as dense as Chanyeol is?  
  
Baekhyun wonders if Chanyeol knows about his crush on him. If he’s been obvious that even Sehun and Jongin could tell his feelings for his best friend, has Chanyeol picked it up, too? _Oh god, please no._ The last thing he wants is for Chanyeol to return his feelings out of pity. Surely Baekhyun’s actions can be masked as friendly gestures.  
  
...right?  
  
  
  
  
  


 

*

  
  
  
  
  
  
School passes by in a haze for Baekhyun who couldn’t stop thinking about Chanyeol, Chanyeol, Chanyeol. During lectures, Baekhyun can’t help but gaze out the window and daydream about him and Chanyeol being lovey-dovey.  
  
Daydreams like Chanyeol feeding him a slice of cake and Chanyeol wiping the icing off Baekhyun’s lips, and then licking the icing off his finger. Or maybe Chanyeol would kiss Baekhyun as he licks the sides of Baekhyun’s lips clean. Baekhyun’s grin is brighter than his future, if he keeps on ignoring the teacher in front and dreaming of Chanyeol. He’s got it so bad.  
  
A crumpled piece of paper hits him on the cheek. He glances to his right where he knows the culprit is seated, rows away from him.  
  
Chanyeol winks at him cheekily.  
  
Baekhyun rolls his eyes but on the inside, he can hardly breathe. Why does he make every gesture Chanyeol does, a sign of flirting? He’s putting too much color on these little things.  
  
He picks up the crumpled note and reads the message there.  
  
_what’s with the :D ???!?_  
  
Baekhyun doesn’t even write back a crumpled reply. He just faces Chanyeol and, making sure that the teacher is still writing down something on the board, he sticks his tongue out to Chanyeol.  
  
  
  
  
  


 

*

  
  
  
  
  
  
After the classes, Chanyeol is by his seat before Baekhyun is finished packing up his things.  
  
“You were daydreaming again a while ago.”  
  
Baekhyun doesn’t reply.  
  
Chanyeol sighs. “That’s some lucky boy you’re crushing on.”  
  
Baekhyun scoffs. _If only you knew_ you _are that lucky boy._ “Why would you say so?”  
  
“Baek, I’ve been with you for a long time. I know how caring you are, how sweet you could be, how—”  
  
“Chanyeol!” Someone from the door calls. Chanyeol turns around and sees Seulgi from History Club calling him.  
  
“Must be some club thing. Meet me by my scooter?”  
  
Baekhyun nods before Chanyeol bolts out of the classroom. When he is gone, Baekhyun blinks and tries to wrap his mind around Chanyeol’s words. Did Chanyeol just point out how caring and sweet — and god knows what else he was about to say — Baekhyun is? Baekhyun certainly isn’t blushing. Or well, he tries not to, because really, his crush complimenting him? How can he _not_ blush?  
  
  
  
  
  


 

*

  
  
  
  
  
  
As Baekhyun makes his way to the scooters’ parking lot, he passes by the Bio Lab where he sees his best friend talking to some girl. It’s not Seulgi — she’s nowhere to be seen — but Baekhyun can remember the girl to be a friend of Seulgi. The girl looks serious talking to Chanyeol. _It must be some big deal in the club,_ Baekhyun deduces. He almost goes on his way when he hears the girl’s voice which is loud enough this time to catch his attention.  
  
“I like you, Chanyeol. Please date me.” Her tone is very determined and it looks like she won’t take no for an answer.  
  
Baekhyun stops in his tracks and strains his ears for Chanyeol’s reply. He knows it’s not nice to eavesdrop, but he also knows that Chanyeol wouldn’t mind since they really don’t hide anything from each other. (Except maybe their feelings.)  
  
Chanyeol says he’s sorry, and the girl’s composure breaks. Chanyeol’s voice is softer when he says the next words that Baekhyun doesn’t catch them at all.  
  
Baekhyun goes on his way to the parking lot, not looking back. He’s jealous of the girl for having the courage to confess with such determination. When will he have that courage, too? When it’s already too late?  
  
“Hey.” Chanyeol appears beside him and ruffles his hair. “Did you wait long?”  
  
Baekhyun shakes his head and hops on the scooter behind Chanyeol. When they drive past the gates, Baekhyun steels himself. He’s gonna say it. It’s now or never. If he gets rejected, it shouldn’t be the end of the world.  
  
He starts humming one of his favorite songs. It’s nothing out of the usual, because Chanyeol knows Baekhyun likes singing. So softly, Baekhyun starts singing, the lyrics almost whispers against Chanyeol’s uniform.  
  
_From the moment I started liking you  
Not a single day has been ordinary  
We’re close friends, we pretend not to have feelings..._  
  
Baekhyun’s voice starts fading. There aren’t any cars passing by in this small town road. The sky is starting to turn orange.  
  
“Chanyeol-ah,” Baekhyun starts, clutching Chanyeol’s polo shirt tighter in his hands. The pause takes longer than it was suppposed to be. Baekhyun’s tongue suddenly feels like lead, his mouth now dry, his tongue tied, and his words crawling away to hide in the pit of his stomach. The words _I like you_ seemed easy to say when he was practicing it in front of the bathroom mirror some mornings but now that he is finally put in the situation, he doubts he can do it. He wants to channel the courage and determination that girl a while ago had.  
  
“Do you have something to say?”  
  
Chanyeol’s voice surprised him out of his nervousness enough to make him blurt out, “I like you!”  
  
The entire world stops — or at least Baekhyun’s did. He did not _ever_ expect his confession to come out that way.  
  
Chanyeol stops the scooter in the middle of the road and turns around to look at Baekhyun. He stares.  
  
Baekhyun blinks once. It’s suffocating — the way the deafening silence between them stretches, slowly sucking the life out of Baekhyun. There’s no reply from Chanyeol who just keeps on staring at Baekhyun. _Did he really say it already? Has Chanyeol heard him?_ Baekhyun blinks for the second time. He thought he was holding his breath but he realizes he couldn’t breathe at all.  
  
And then Baekhyun forces his face to break into a smile, as natural as it could be when his heart is breaking into tiny pieces.  
  
“J-just kidding,” Baekhyun says as he lets out a loud laugh. He shuts his eyes as he laughs, because he thinks it’s more convincing that way, but the truth is: he just doesn’t want to see Chanyeol’s reaction to his crazy confession.  
  
Just in time when Baekhyun opens his eyes, he sees Chanyeol blinking back a confused expression. (Baekhyun thinks there’s also pain in those eyes but he dare not dwell on it.)  
  
Chanyeol ruffles Baekhyun’s hair before saying, “You almost got me there.”  
  
Baekhyun chuckles in a low tone. He hopes Chanyeol doesn’t hear the crack in his laughter. “You should’ve seen your face.”  
  
“You should’ve seen _your_ face. It’s like you were afraid I’d reject you.” Chanyeol starts driving to their houses again.  
  
Baekhyun just hums along with the wind running through their faces, because Chanyeol hit the spot there, alright. Baekhyun really _is_ afraid of Chanyeol’s rejection. Hugging Chanyeol from the back instead of just clinging on the his waist, Baekhyun whispers, “That was just me practicing, Yeol. Whatever happens, we should be friends forever. Okay?”  
  
(As Baekhyun leaned his forehead on Chanyeol’s nape, heart cracking at his own words, he doesn’t see the pout and teary eyes on Chanyeol’s face.)  
  
  
  
  
  


 

*

  
  
  
  
  
  
“I tried yesterday, but I failed.” Baekhyun sighs. He’s facing Sehun and Jongin again today because he’s free to talk about Chanyeol to his only friends who would listen because said subject matter just went to the restroom.  
  
What was ridiculous was when Chanyeol asked Baekhyun to accompany him to the restroom but Baekhyun fought and asked him what the hell would he be doing in the restroom that he wants Baekhyun to come with him. The moment Chanyeol went silent was when Baekhyun realized his question came out wrong. He looked at Sehun and Jongin who were silent on their seats — the latter with an amused expression. Heat started to creep on Baekhyun’s nape. Chanyeol scowled, then told him, “If you don’t wanna, just say so,” before he stomps out of the classroom. _What the hell was that…_  
  
Baekhyun keeps on sighing, unable to hide his regrets, as he recounts yesterday’s events to the couple in front of him.  
  
Jongin looks like he’s seriously contemplating about yesterday’s situation. “What if you didn’t take it back? Maybe he would’ve asked you out.”  
  
Baekhyun slumps on his seat. “I don’t know anymore. I’m starting to think everything was just a dream.”  
  
“Aww, come here, Baek. Let me hug you and take that sadness away from you,” Sehun offers.  
  
Baekhyun lets the younger one hug him.  
  
“What’re you gonna do with his sadness?” Jongin asks his boyfriend.  
  
“Give it to you.” Sehun answers, but when Jongin looks a bit confused, he smirks. “Then you can spend tonight comforting me.’  
  
Baekhyun chokes and struggles to get off Sehun’s embrace. “Wait, Baek—”  
  
“Baekhyun,” calls out a deeper voice that’s all too familiar. It’s Chanyeol.  
  
Sehun lets him go so he can be with Chanyeol.  
  
Apparently, Chanyeol is a “little confused” with some Calculus equation which Baekhyun knows he doesn’t need help with. If anything, it should be Baekhyun asking help from Chanyeol with matters like this considering how Chanyeol always tops the exams. So why is Chanyeol doing this? Baekhyun smiles to himself when he thinks that Chanyeol’s just making up ridiculous excuses to spend time with him. _This giant baby,_ Baekhyun says in his head as his heart flutters.  
  
Chanyeol leans closer to Baekhyun because the latter intentionally softens his voice for that purpose.  
  
“Is this correct?” Chanyeol asks, turning to look at him. Their faces are so close that Baekhyun can feel Chanyeol’s breath on his lips.  
  
Baekhyun swallows back his nervousness. “I- I think so.” He notices Chanyeol’s eyes flicker down to catch the movement of his lips and damn it all Baekhyun just wanna lean closer and smash their lips together—  
  
But the teacher chooses that moment to enter the room and Chanyeol looks at Baekhyun in the eyes, not moving away yet. “You should go back to your seat.”  
  
Baekhyun is the first to lean away, scuttling back to his seat as Chanyeol clears his desk.  
  
_Too close. That was too close._ Baekhyun clutches his chest as he struggles to steady his breathing. Park Chanyeol, his best friend since he was a kid, has this effect on Baekhyun. Yup, Chanyeol just rendered him breathless.  
  
  
  
  
  


 

*

  
  
  
  
  
  
That afternoon when they go home together, with Baekhyun hitching on Chanyeol’s scooter, Chanyeol asks out of the blue, “Do you like Sehun?”  
  
Baekhyun’s eyes widen before he passionately says no. “Both he and Jongin has just been helping me with something lately,” he explains, but stops right there because why does he need to explain? Unconsciously, he clutches Chanyeol’s polo tighter. “But so what if I do,” he mutters to himself, thinking that Chanyeol wouldn’t hear him over the noise of the scooter.  
  
“It’s okay,” Chanyeol says. “You didn’t have to explain it. It’s not my business anyway. It’s just that, your best friend should at least know about your crush or something.”  
  
_Well, if only my best friend isn’t too blind to see my feelings for him, he’d see that I’ve been crushing on him for years now,_ Baekhyun thinks.  
  
Through the side mirror, Baekhyun can see Chanyeol smiling. Halfway through their way home, Chanyeol is humming verses of the song Baekhyun was singing yesterday, and then he starts singing some parts faintly that Baekhyun almost never heard him.  
  
_They tell me to confess my feelings  
When I say goodbye to you, I feel weird for some reason  
We’re close friends, we pretend not to have feelings  
I introduce you as a good friend  
But there are words lingering in my mouth  
I am in love with you… _  
  
  
  
  
  


 

*

  
  
  
  
  
  
The next day at school, everything changes.  
  
It all started when Baekhyun gets Junki as his partner in a Physics project. He takes a look at Chanyeol who was partnered with a random girl. Surprisingly, Chanyeol was already looking at him, but breaks the eye contact when Baekhyun caught him watching.  
  
Baekhyun notices Junki’s touchiness, slinging an arm around him and whispering something so close to his ear that Baekhyun can feel soft lips brushing against his earlobes. Baekhyun giggles because it tickles.  
  
But what Chanyeol sees is the sight of them being so close and Baekhyun being so comfortable in Junki’s arms. He doesn’t want to wrap his head around the idea that Baekhyun has a crush on Junki. He needs space.  
  
Baekhyun gets ignored by his best friend for the rest of the day.  
  
  
  
  
  


 

* * *

  
  
  
  
  
  
Chanyeol trusts Baekhyun, he does. But perhaps Baekhyun doesn’t return that trust. He’s hurt that his best friend won’t tell him he liked Junki and he had to hear about it from other people’s gossip.  
  
Chanyeol glances at Junki, seated near the front. What does he have that Chanyeol doesn’t? What did Baekhyun see in him? But the more important question is, will Junki love Baekhyun the way Chanyeol can?  
  
But when he sees Baekhyun giggling at something Junki probably whispered, Chanyeol feels queasy. He clenches and unclenches his fists under his desk. He should be the one making Baekhyun giggle; he should be the one at the receiving end of Baekhyun’s smile and laughter. He is Baekhyun’s best friend, after all…  
  
_Yeah, Park, but you’re not his_ boyfriend. _You can get jealous all you want but you don’t get the right to show it._ Chanyeol sighs.  
  
The moment he sat on his seat after the Physics class was when he heard Sehun and Jongin talking by themselves.  
  
“How lucky can Baekhyun get?”  
  
“I know right. I need to throw a party first before we got together and Baekhyun gets his love life served to him on a platter.”  
  
Chanyeol looks up from his seat. Were they talking about Baekhyun and Junki? Was it the reason Baekhyun became close with them? Was he asking them help with Junki? Chanyeol frowns. Why didn’t Baekhyun ask him for help?  
  
It’s like he’s no one in Baekhyun’s life at all…  
  
“Sehun,” he calls out.  
  
Sehun and Jongin turn around to face him.  
  
“Is Baekhyun— does Baekhyun like Junki?”  
  
Sehun raises a brow at his question. “What do you think?”  
  
Chanyeol furrows his brows.  
  
What does he think? He thinks Baekhyun’s been distancing away from him; that he’s not trustworthy enough for Baekhyun; that Chanyeol is lacking as a best friend; that he’s not fulfilling his best friend duties…  
  
He can’t do this anymore. Chanyeol bows his head and gets out of the classroom. He needs to be alone and collect his thoughts.  
  
  
  
  
  


 

* * *

  
  
  
  
  
  
The day ends with Baekhyun’s thoughts scrambled in a mess. Why has he not talked to his own best friend for an entire day? He couldn’t recall doing something that could have offended Chanyeol. He couldn’t recall _interacting_ with Chanyeol, really. The guy just skipped the classes after Physics. He wasn’t in their secret places, either.  
  
At the end of the day, Baekhyun waits for Chanyeol at his scooter’s parking lot. It’s still there, so Chanyeol hasn’t gone home yet.  
  
Chanyeol comes before the sun sets and just gives Baekhyun a look before starting up the scooter — no greeting, not even a smile. He doesn’t drive away, though, and that’s how Baekhyun knows Chanyeol would still drive him home even if they’re on the wrong foot.  
  
_Wrong foot?_ What did Baekhyun even do? He doesn’t know. There’s always an argument between them before Chanyeol would act like this, but today, literally nothing happened between them.  
  
Baekhyun straps his helmet on by himself, unconsciously pouting at the lack of Chanyeol’s attention. He holds the scooter’s sides, afraid that Chanyeol will snap at him if he clings on Chanyeol’s waist like the usual.  
  
Chanyeol drives away from the school, but doesn’t drop Baekhyun on their driveway. Chanyeol just parks his scooter inside their garage and gets down. When Baekhyun follows, Chanyeol is already slipping into their house. Baekhyun stares at his retreating form.  
  
_Why is Chanyeol so cruel..._  
  
Baekhyun catches up with Chanyeol inside the house. It looks like Mama and Papa Park aren’t home yet. Good, then, because Baekhyun wants to confront Chanyeol. He doesn’t want to leave them being like this — having a cold war with Baekhyun not knowing the reason why. He finds his best friend drinking water in the kitchen. When Chanyeol places the glass on the counter, Baekhyun speaks softly, “Yeol, tell me what the problem is...”  
  
Without turning around to face Baekhyun, Chanyeol replies, “What am I to you, Baekhyun?”  
  
Baekhyun takes a deep breath at how sad Chanyeol’s voice sounds. “Wh-what do you mean?”  
  
Chanyeol then turns to face him and strides around the counter towards Baekhyun before surprising him with a hug. Chanyeol’s hugs were always warm, and this one isn’t different. Baekhyun slowly wraps his arms around his best friend and silently hopes Chanyeol wouldn’t feel his heart pounding against his chest. Chanyeol pulls him impossibly closer, leaning down to perch his chin on Baekhyun’s shoulder.  
  
Whatever is on Chanyeol’s mind right now, Baekhyun deduces it’s pretty serious. Baekhyun honestly doesn’t know what to do because he’s never been put in a situation like this before. Chanyeol’s been the stronger one between them – he’s the one who has been comforting Baekhyun before.  
  
As an attempt to alleviate Chanyeol’s sadness, Baekhyun pats Chanyeol’s back, hoping it’s enough for comfort.  
  
“Yeol, what’s wrong?”  
  
Then Baekhyun feels his shoulder getting drenched and his heart prickles at the realization that Chanyeol is crying.  
  
“You can tell me anything. We’re best friends.”  
  
“Exactly!” Chanyeol pulls away from Baekhyun, and he sounds... angry? “I’m your best friend, Baekhyun!”  
  
Baekhyun cringes at Chanyeol’s raised voice. A myriad of emotions flash on Chanyeol’s face and he’s never seen Chanyeol like this before. But why does it feel like it’s Baekhyun’s fault?  
  
“Just your best friend,” Chanyeol whispers through gritted teeth, harshly wiping the tears on his cheek with his arm. “We’re best friends yet you can’t even tell me who your crush is?”  
  
_That is what it’s all about?_  
  
Baekhyun tries to be calm about it. “Yeol, that’s nothing serious—”  
  
“You know what hurts the most? You not trusting me enough. Ten years into our friendship and you can still keep secrets from me. I’ll accept anyone you like, okay? Just try me, Baek. Sehun knows, and even Jongin does, too. You guys weren’t that close…” Chanyeol’s voice fades. “I’m the only one in the shadows.”  
  
At the moment, a tears slip down Baekhyun’s cheek. If only Chanyeol knew how hard it was to keep holding back when he could have been screaming to the world how much he loves him. Did he really make Chanyeol feel that way? What kind of best friend is he?  
  
He wants to hug Chanyeol right now – that is the only comfort he knows – and he is about to do just that when the front door clicks open. Mama and Papa Park are back. Chanyeol zooms past Baekhyun before anything could be said.  
  
With a heavy heart, Baekhyun exits the Park house through the kitchen back door.  
  
  
  
  
  


 

* * *

  
  
  
  
  
  
Chanyeol turns around for the millionth time on his bed. He can’t sleep.  
  
The look on Baekhyun’s face when he exploded that afternoon is haunting him every time he closes his eyes. God knows how much he fucking wanted to wipe those tears that he has caused and to engulf Baekhyun in a tight embrace. But stupid, stupid, _stupid._  
  
When will Chanyeol ever stop being such a coward?  
  
Instead of comforting Baekhyun, he ran away like the coward that he is.  
  
He even skipped dinner because he can’t face his parents with bloodshot eyes lest they interrogate him about it.  
  
When he skipped classes a while ago, alone in the botanical garden, he just spaced out and ended up missing looking at Baekhyun.  
  
Perhaps what he needs right now is a drive to the nearest convenience store two blocks away and get a late night snack as he contemplates about his outburst at Baekhyun.  
  
He grabs his helmet and heads out.  
  
  
  
  
  


 

*

  
  
  
  
  
  
When he parks his scooter by the road side, he sees Sehun and Jongin coming out of the convenience store with a plastic bag on the latter’s hand. Chanyeol’s issues momentarily leave his mind when he gapes at the packs of condoms inside the plastic bag.  
  
“Haven’t heard of grooming, Chanyeol?” Jongin snickers.  
  
“How would Baekhyun look at you now when you’re such an eyesore?”  
  
Chanyeol sighs, not really in the mood to banter with these two.  
  
They end up with cans of beer inside the convenience store. Chanyeol settles his helmet in front of him. He may have discovered why Baekhyun likes hanging out with these two – they’re so laidback and can manage to take his mind off his problems.  
  
“Guess we’ll have to delay our play time, babe,” Jongin whispers, but Chanyeol catches still it. He takes a swig of his beer.  
  
“I’m jealous of you guys,” he tells them.  
  
“Well then, go and fess up now so you’ll be in a relationship, too.”  
  
“It’s not that.” Chanyeol glares at them. “Baekhyun’s my best friend, yet he tells you two his secrets and not me. Me, his best friend…”  
  
Chanyeol catches Sehun rolling his eyes.  
  
“Chanyeol.” Sehun’s tone is suddenly so serious. “You do know that you’re not angry at Baekhyun keeping it a secret, right? You’re jealous that the person you’ve liked for a long time doesn’t like you back? You’re jealous that he likes someone else?”  
  
“What’s with all those questions? I’m— Baekhyun is my best friend, okay? I just want him to trust me, too.” Chanyeol doesn’t want them to know about his feelings for Baekhyun because Baekhyun should be the first one to know that when Chanyeol finally confesses it himself.  
  
“Sure, whatever you say,” Jongin says before draining his entire can of beer. “Keep on denying that and lose him for real.”  
  
The words feel like a slap on his face.  
  
Sehun and Jongin stand up from their seats and tells him they’ll go ahead first. Chanyeol stares at his can of beer and looks up when Jongin calls him before exiting the store.  
  
“Did you really think Baekhyun likes Junki?”  
  
Chanyeol nods. Sehun rolls his eyes again, like he’s had enough. “He doesn’t, okay? Baekhyun doesn’t like Junki.”  
  
“Fuck.” In a millisecond, Chanyeol stands up and rushes to his scooter, driving to where he knows his heart belongs.  
  
  
  
  
  


 

* * *

  
  
  
  
  
  
Baekhyun is curled up on his bed, crying on his pillow to muffle his sobs when he hears the rustling of leaves on the tree outside his window. He ignores it and wallows some more about his problems.  
  
He was devastated at what he had done with Chanyeol. He thought keeping his feelings for his best friend was the best thing to do but it only led them to this. Why did it have to become so complicated?  
  
He buries his head under his pillow and doesn’t notice his window sliding open.  
  
Chanyeol stares at the sobbing mess on the bed that is Baekhyun and his heart clenches. Baekhyun is still even in his uniform, forgetting to change out of it because of all the pain Chanyeol has inflicted on him.  
  
“I’m so sorry, Baek,” he whispers.  
  
Baekhyun isn’t sure if he imagined Chanyeol’s voice apologizing to him but when he sits up and finds him standing by his bed, he gasps and runs to his window, craning his neck to look at their front yard, seeing Chanyeol’s scooter.  
  
“You rode your scooter?”  
  
“Yeah, it doesn’t matter— Baek, I—”  
  
“You forgot to wear your helmet? Chanyeol, you’re so dumb!” Baekhyun doesn’t want to, but chunky Ghibli tears just start rolling down his cheek and gathering on his chin before they drop to the floor. “What if something happened while you were driving? You’re dumb enough not to know my fee—”  
  
His rant is stopped when he feels Chanyeol’s arms around him. Baekhyun is weak for Chanyeol’s tight hug. He wanted to give Chanyeol a piece of his mind but all of that is wavering because of the arms that give him comfort.  
  
“I know. But stop crying, Baek, please.”  
  
“Dumb Yeol,” Baekhyun whimpers, burying his face on Chanyeol’s chest as he calms down.  
  
Chanyeol chuckles. He whispers against Baekhyun’s skin, “Let’s stay like this for a while.”  
  
The hug goes on for a few minutes, but can’t be more than five when Chanyeol releases him.  
  
“I’m just your best friend, Baek.” Chanyeol sounds somewhat sad. “That’s all I am to you, right?”  
  
Baekhyun blinks. Chanyeol just stole the words out of his mouth.  
  
“I’m okay with that. I’m contented with that. If that’s the only way to keep you by my side, I’m fine with that.” Just when he said it, a lone tear rolls down his cheek and he quickly wipes it with his palm, muttering _damn it_ before sniffling. “I mean, I used to be fine with that. But now I’m done pretending. For the past years, Baekhyun, I’ve always liked you. You’re more than just a best friend to me.”  
  
“Chanyeol-ah...” Baekhyun is breathless, speechless. Baekhyun’s eyes may be watery but he can clearly see Chanyeol’s honesty in those tear-stained eyes.  
  
“I thought you liked Junki and my confession wouldn’t change anything, but—”  
  
“What did you just say?” Baekhyun’s tone is low — maybe he is angry at Chanyeol that he can’t see _he_ is the object of Baekhyun’s affection when Jongin and Sehun can fucking see it crystal clearly. He’s shocked that his best friend assumed he likes someone else - where did Chanyeol get that idea from?  
  
“I now know you don’t really like him, okay? But whoever it is that you’re crushing on, I’ll support you—”  
  
“Well, you clearly don’t know shit about me!”  
  
Chanyeol’s eyes widen. After all, it’s not every day that Baekhyun raises his voice at him and even cursing him with that tone of talking.  
  
“Because Chanyeol, I like you as much as you like me! Or even more. I’ve been saving my first kiss for you. Even if you like me less, I have more than enough love for the both of us to compensate for that.” Baekhyun drops his gaze to the floor, suddenly feeling shy and conscious. “I can’t believe you thought I liked Junki, or whoever. You’re too dense you haven’t noticed me looking at you with heart eyes—”  
  
Baekhyun is cut off when Chanyeol engulfs him with another hug. “Ah, Baekhyun, my heart is gonna burst.” Chanyeol squeezes him and any tighter Baekhyun thinks _he_ is the one that’s gonna burst. Chanyeol lets him go but his hands are still gripping Baekhyun’s arms as he looks at Baekhyun seriously in the eyes. “Tell me you’re not kidding me this time.”  
  
Baekhyun blushes as he remembers his failure of a confession. “I swear I mean it. I meant it that time, too, but you looked like you didn’t want to hear them from me.”  
  
“I was trying to figure out if I was dreaming or not.” Chanyeol pouts at him. “Then you said you were kidding and, ah, I knew it was too good to be true.”  
  
“Well, I can assure you this is not a dream. Okay?”  
  
“Okay.”  
  
  
  
  
  


 

*

  
  
  
  
  
  
“Why did you have so many girlfriends when you liked me from the start?”  
  
Chanyeol is leaning comfortably on the headboard with Baekhyun’s head on his lap. He’s playing with Baekhyun’s hair, running his hands through the strands or twirling them on his fingers. “I thought you only wanted me to be your best friend... I wanted them to distract me from my feelings for you—”  
  
“That’s so cruel, Yeol.”  
  
"—but I guess they already knew I had not much commitment with whatever we had because they told me they accepted the breakup as well as I did.”  
  
“No wonder you never cried for any of them. I thought you didn’t have a heart. Or if you had one, it was made of ice,” Baekhyun muses.  
  
“Excuse you, if only you knew how much I cried thinking about my unrequited love for you.”  
  
Baekhyun huffs. “I still can’t believe you didn’t know I liked you. Even Jongin and Sehun knew. They said it shows in the way I looked at you.”  
  
Chanyeol looks down at Baekhyun’s pretty face, long lashes fanning his blushing cheeks. “Look who’s talking. You didn’t know I liked you either. Fuck, we’re so good at either being dense, or hiding our feelings.” They both chuckle. “And tell me, how do you look at me, exactly?”  
  
Baekhyun looks up at him, and Chanyeol can swear he sees sparkles in Baekhyun’s eyes, as exaggerated as it may seem. “Like you’re my entire universe,” Baekhyun says as he flutters his eyes coyly.  
  
And Chanyeol just couldn’t resist him anymore. He leans down and bops his nose with Baekhyun’s, making the smaller guy giggle and soon Chanyeol joins him, planting butterfly kisses on the planes of Baekhyun’s face — the apple of his cheekbones, his temples, the mole on his upper lip Chanyeol can’t get enough of. Soon, Chanyeol is tickling Baekhyun’s ribs until he is flailing his arms trying to stop the assaults.  
  
“Ah, stop it,” Baekhyun pants, but Chanyeol is relentless and keeps on touching him, lifting the hem of Baekhyun’s uniform to tickle the bare skin of his waist. Baekhyun resorts to rolling off the bed and onto the floor away from the taller guy. “I need to catch my breath first.”  
  
“Okay, okay, I’ll stop.” Chanyeol even raises his hands up in an act of surrender. “Just come back here. No more tickles, I promise.”  
  
Baekhyun looks doubtful for a second but when Chanyeol opens his arms for him, Baekhyun crawls back to his lap like a puppy, and they hug first before they lay back on the bed again, just cuddling as if they’ve never done it before.  
  
Baekhyun never wants to let go.  
  
  
  
  
  


 

*

  
  
  
  
  
  
And apparently, Chanyeol has the same idea. Chanyeol clings to Baekhyun when the latter goes downstairs to drink water in the kitchen. When Baekhyun walks back towards his bedroom to change out of his uniform, Chanyeol lets himself be dragged upstairs as he refuses to let go of his back hug around Baekhyun’s waist.  
  
“Finally I can do these things without worrying about you knowing about my feelings for you,” Chanyeol mutters as he buries his nose on Baekhyun’s hair and sniffs its baby scent.  
  
Baekhyun opens his closet and fishes for his favorite shirt – it’s Chanyeol’s, one of the many that gets left behind during their sleepovers – an oversized shirt with the label Supreme across its chest. He also grabs his own sweatpants.  
  
Baekhyun turns around in Chanyeol’s arms and puts a space between the two of them, pushing the taller guy away but still close enough that Chanyeol’s hold around Baekhyun is still intact. Baekhyun scowls. “Yeol, I’m gonna go change.”  
  
Chanyeol raises an eyebrow at him. “You can’t do that here?”  
  
Pink colors Baekhyun’s cheeks. He wasn’t conscious about his body before when they were just _bros_ but now that they’ve confessed their mutual feelings, Baekhyun feels a bit shy around Chanyeol now. (A tiny part of his mind tells him this is exactly what he didn’t want to happen: for him to not be able to act _normally_ around Chanyeol anymore.)  
  
Chanyeol pulls him close again and brings them both to the bed. After sitting on the edge of it, Chanyeol grabs Baekhyun to sit down on his lap. Baekhyun’s eyes are wide, thinking about a million ways to tell Chanyeol, _no, we’re going too fast, Yeolee._  
  
Baekhyun’s heart is fucking pounding in his chest when Chanyeol reaches a hand between them while his other hand settles itself on the small of Baekhyun’s back. Baekhyun can almost not believe that Chanyeol is actually unbuttoning his polo shirt — he’s certain he’s gonna wake up any minute now.  
  
When Chanyeol is done with the buttons, he pushes the polo off Baekhyun’s shoulders and slips them off his arms. Baekhyun hopes Chanyeol can’t feel him squirming on his lap. Baekhyun looks at Chanyeol’s face and finds Chanyeol looking at _his face_. Well, it’s not like Chanyeol has never seen Baekhyun’s bare torso before, anyway. Chanyeol’s almond-shaped eyes have some certain softness in them.  
  
“Raise your hands up, Baekhyunee,” Chanyeol coos.  
  
Baekhyun pouts, but does so anyway. Chanyeol slips his shirt in until Baekhyun’s head appears from the neck hole, hair sticking up to every direction. Chanyeol immediately steals a kiss from his lips. Baekhyun gasps.  
  
“First proper kiss. Stolen from Baekhyunee after I let him wear my shirt.”  
  
If Baekhyun’s face wasn’t burning yet, it is now. How does Chanyeol manage to make his heart flutter every second?  
  
“Now go put on these sweatpants yourself, you big baby.” Chanyeol puts Baekhyun down from his lap before slapping the sweatpants on Baekhyun’s butt.  
  
“Ow!” Baekhyun complains even if it doesn’t sting at all.  
  
Chanyeol laughs and pats Baekhyun’s butt. “Sorry, babe.” He strides to his closet and picks out his change of clothes as Baekhyun changes into his sweatpants.  
  
Staring at Chanyeol’s back muscles flex made Baekhyun’s throat dry.  
  
When they’re both done, Chanyeol goes back to clinging to Baekhyun like a monkey before maneuvering the both of them to the bed and plopping onto the mattress.  
  
Baekhyun giggles. “Aren’t you afraid I’m gonna get used to your touch and gets annoyed with your clinginess?”  
  
Chanyeol gives him a look before propping up an elbow and leaning his head on his palm. He’s gazing down at Baekhyun.  
  
Chanyeol brings his free hand to touch Baekhyun’s face gently. “I won’t let that happen,” he says as he makes small circles with his thumb on Baekhyun’s face.  
  
Baekhyun catches Chanyeol’s hand on his own and intertwines them together. Chanyeol’s hand is much bigger than his own. He already knows that, but it still amazes him that their hands fit each other perfectly. He notices the tattoos on their wrists.  
  
“ _Aimer et être aimé_ ,” Baekhyun reads in a soft voice.  
  
“To love and to be loved,” Chanyeol translates. He lies down and snuggles close to Baekhyun, a leg over Baekhyun’s own, their hands still clasped together. “I realized on my sixteenth birthday that I didn’t wanna be without you. I’ve always known I had some special feelings for you but I guess that time was when I finally realized I love you more than just a best friend. This tattoo... I wanted to be the one to love you and be loved by you, that’s why I asked you to get it with me. I guess being your best friend was the safest role for that. Until I’ve had enough, because I can’t pretend anymore. I can’t pretend I don’t wanna kiss every inch of your skin; I can’t pretend I don’t want you, in my arms and forever by my side. I just—”  
  
Baekhyun kisses his mouth to shut him up, but also because he really wants to. Chanyeol’s lips moving while being so close to his face is making him go crazy.  
  
_Crazy in love_.  
  
A few minutes of just chaste lip-locking pass before Chanyeol runs his tongue on Baekhyun’s lower lip, making Baekhyun gasp at the warmth and Chanyeol slowly dives his tongue into Baekhyun’s mouth. Baekhyun lets him in and they get a taste of each other — not indirect kissing this time but just boyfriends making out. Baekhyun pulls Chanyeol closer by the nape, and Chanyeol sneaks a hand under Baekhyun’s shirt (well, _his_ Supreme shirt), touching Baekhyun’s burning skin. Baekhyun’s whimpers against Chanyeol’s mouth get swallowed down. Baekhyun slides his hand down to Chanyeol’s bicep when Chanyeol explores higher on his torso, grazing his thumb on Baekhyun’s pebbled nipple. Baekhyun’s entire body jerks at the sensation and he pulls away from the kiss in a desperate attempt to catch his breath.  
  
“Fuck,” Baekhyun pants.  
  
Chanyeol just wolfishly grins at him as if he has many more tricks up his sleeve. His hand is distractingly squeezing the flesh on Baekhyun’s ribs.  
  
“That was hot,” Baekhyun says before lunging forward to catch Chanyeol’s lips again. This time, he climbs on Chanyeol’s lap and settles comfortably on it. Baekhyun wants _more_ and this little devil inside his head (he’d like to name it Baekhoe) says, “Pull the sweatpants down!” Baekhyun wanted to – his hands are itching to fulfill his wet dreams – but at the same time, he doesn’t want Baekhoe to win over his control.  
  
Things were getting heated when they hear Mama Byun’s voice calling from the living hall. “Baekhyun! When are you gonna eat dinner?”  
  
Baekhyun could not have jolted away as quickly as he did.  
  
“You haven’t eaten dinner yet?”  
  
Baekhyun shakes his head. “Was too busy moping at the thought of you cutting your ties with me.”  
  
“Never gonna happen, okay?” Chanyeol assures him as he leans closer to kiss Baekhyun’s forehead.  
  
Baekhyun’s cheeks color as he nods shyly.  
  
“Wanna eat?”  
  
Baekhyun nods eagerly.  
  
“Your lips are swollen. God, what is Mama Byun gonna think of me now.” Chanyeol buries his head in his hands.  
  
“I’m pretty sure mom’s gonna support whatever her son loves doing.” Baekhyun grins at him before leaning closer. “And that’s kissing you.”  
  
  
  
  
  


 

*

  
  
  
  
  
  
Mama Byun is busy in the kitchen when they came down for a meal at shit o’clock in the evening.  
  
“Oh, I didn’t know you came over, Chanyeol. Good thing I prepared extra.”  
  
Surprisingly the late dinner goes by without any suspicious stares from Mama Byun. If she has noticed Baekhyun’s and Chanyeol’s swollen lips, she didn’t show it. The food was good, and Baekhyun tells his mom he’ll be playing video games with Chanyeol in his bedroom but what they’re doing right now is far from playing video games.  
  
They’re lying on the bed, the lights switched off and only the faint glow of the television is illuminating the room. Chanyeol’s arm is a makeshift pillow for Baekhyun’s head and it seems like Chanyeol’s hand has picked up a new hobby — playing with Baekhyun’s hair.  
  
“Your hair is so soft, Baek,” Chanyeol whispers into the fragile night.  
  
“Yeah, you’ve told me countless of times.”  
  
“I can’t get used—”  
  
“—to how soft it is? I know.” Baekhyun smirks. In the darkness, Chanyeol can’t see it but he knows Baekhyun is doing so.  
  
“Finishing my sentences... It makes you so boyfriend.”  
  
Baekhyun squeals when Chanyeol engulfs him in a tight hug and rolls Baekhyun on top of him. The sounds of their hearts beating are in sync.  
  
Baekhyun gazes up at Chanyeol, planting his chin on Chanyeol’s chest. Here is the person he spent more than half of his life with, the person he’s been in love with since forever…  
  
“Hey, boyfriend,” Baekhyun whispers.  
  
Chanyeol is grinning at him. Unable to contain his delight, he leans closer and pecks Baekhyun’s forehead. “Yep, that’s me. I’m your boyfriend. I’m yours, you’re mine.”  
  
Baekhyun bursts into giggles. His eyes are sparkling with the low glow of the TV. “We’re in love, aren’t we?”  
  
“Yes.” Chanyeol drops a kiss on Baekhyun’s nose. “Of course, we are.”  
  
  
  
  
  


 

* * *

  
  
  
  
  
  
_I, Baekhyun, take Chanyeol, my childhood friend, best friend for ten years and counting, as my one true love. I will cherish every moment we’ll spend together and I will love him more each day just like he promised me he would love me more than I love him. I will trust him, no more keeping of secrets. I will laugh with him and cry with him, through good times and bad, through sunshine and storms, regardless of whatever problems we may face. I know that with him by my side, life will be easier. I’m lucky to be in love with and to be loved by Park Chanyeol._  
  
  
  
  
  


 

* * *

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



End file.
